Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Creating in Emptiness

Revisiting this blog, after almost a year. So much has happenned. I really should write more often. Make that - I really will write more often.

A friend left for a month - leaving me with suddenly empty evenings. All current personal projects, brainstorming sessions and pleasant outings came to a sudden stop. When I was done watching the latest movies I had bought - the questions has started settling in... what do I do? Such bouts of 'not-knowing' have a history of turning into some of the most creative periods of my life, and I am looking forward to it.

Something similar happenned when I was at home for almost two months after TAPMI (the college where I did my post grad) convocation. I was alone at home in the city where I grew up. The streets seemed unfamilliar with no familiar faces in sight. A whole generation had left the city and a strangeness blanketed the familar 'black field', the 'football ground' and the 'community center'. Even the tennis court had looked intimidating then. My only responsibility then had been to make myself available at dinner and lunch. And I spent a lot of time walking to the browsing center and sending 'Miss You' mails to modellites - that's what our college gang called (calls?) itself. After a while of dealing with this sudden silence, something inside me began to stir. A need to create, a need to express. It appeared with doodling on blank pieces of paper, capturing an idea on the blank sides of the newspaper while solving a crossword and slowly... slowly... took form. This 'stirring' led to me writing a rought sketch of a screenplay based on TAPMI days. And I started writing a book called 'What the F is the meaning of life'. Still incomplete, the book is a potential best-seller :-) , it's just that I have not had much 'quiet time' since then...... till now!

I need these stirrings, or these 'quiet times' to create and express 'felt' things. Otherwise I just get too involved in living life. But the stirring is there. I can feel it. That is wonderful. Therefore, the return to the blog!

So, the next month or so - should ideally be extremely creative and soul-satisfying for me. Make that - will be extremely creative and soul satisfying for me.

Also, working on my new web site (which I recently registered) .

Will come back.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey Abhishek,

Hope you have many more 'soul stirring' moments like the one you're having at the moment...

Hey, NO! Please don't get me wrong. I'm not wishing that you be alone for a long time to come or anything like that. Just saying that this is you. This is the REAL YOU. It's just that sometimes in life, you get so caught up in doing things for others that you neither get the time nor do you have the inclination to EXPRESS YOURSELF.

This is coming from within. So, it's got to be REAL. Not an offshoot of the void that you're feeling at the moment. So, go on and enjoy being yourself. Because that's when you add the most value to yourself and the people around you. The 'friend who left you' won't see the missing value now, but later.

Even if (s)he doesn't, who cares? You still cater to the significant majority. That's what factories that produce 'real goods' do right?

As for you, you don't need to care because you're a value-generating factory. The only input you need for that is this - Be Yourself.

Just an insight from a passerby. Hope that helps. Take care.

Best always.